If you’re a Seinfeld fan, you’re quite familiar with “Bizarro Jerry Seinfeld.” Bizarro Jerry did everything in the exact opposite way that the real Jerry would. The classic episode, of course, is based on the Superman comic book series where Superman had an arch rival villain named Bizarro Superman. Everything about Bizarro Superman was the opposite of Superman. As Seinfeld puts it, he was, “Superman’s exact opposite who lives in the backwards Bizarro world. Up is down, down is up. He says Hello when he leaves and goodbye when he arrives.”
I recently had a fun thought: what’s the opposite of Eastern Christian School? What’s the Bizarro EC? For my money, the best way to find out EC’s opposite is first to articulate exactly who we are and what we strive to be. Fortunately, we are very familiar with who we are and who we strive to be- this is articulated very well in our Core Values. Here’s a quick refresher:
In pursuing the Character of Jesus Christ, we will,
- Seek Truth
- Serve Others
- Embrace Community
- Exhibit Compassion
- Develop Responsibility
- Strive for Excellence
If we want to discover Bizarro EC, we now need to define the exact opposite of those values. So, without further adieu, I give you The Bizarro Core Values of Eastern Christian School:
In pursuing a more fully-realized self, you will:
- Live your truth. There is no one “Capital T” Truth. Only each person’s individual experiences. Do what feels right in your life. Eat, drink, and be merry. As long as you’re not infringing on me and my rights… to each his own!
- Serve yourself. No one else will be looking out for you, so look out for #1. It’s a cruel world, so you need to take care of you.
- Divide and conquer. The only way to get what you want is to divide society into groups. Make others feel like the outsiders so that you can exploit that for your own gains.
- Exhibit indifference. Look, you’re busy enough in your own life, just live and let live. Everybody seems to have an issue that they’re passionate about, but let them worry about that stuff.
- Blame the other. It’s not your fault. You’re basically a good person and you’re trying. If things aren’t working out for you, it’s someone else’s fault.
- Good enough is good enough. Don’t kill yourself to try to get ahead. The game’s rigged anyway- just do enough to get by. No need to bring even more stress into your life.
- The Bizarro core values, while probably a slight caricature, read quite consistent with American culture today. Which, of course means that…
- EC’s core values are incredibly counter-cultural!
EC’s core values are not wallpaper. They’re not just some nice ideas that decorate our walls. We really live these values. Our awesome, nurturing faculty models these values for our students. Our students are given ample opportunities to understand and apply these core values. And in the process, we are developing the next generation of Christian leaders to go into the world and make a difference for Jesus Christ and His Kingdom. And that’s pretty super, man! (sorry… had to)
Want to come and experience what life is like outside of the Bizarro world? You’ve got to see it for yourself!